Xmas poses quite a conundrum for Santa Crumski: He needs mass quantities of coal for ‘gifts’, but he detests Big Coal and its shills, sycophants, and willing slaves. Happy Holidays!
All things Ted.
Everything you could ever want from Ted Crumski, plus piles and piles more.
Ted Gives Thanks
Happy Rage-giving.
Voting Day
[Politicians] < [Those million-legged creepy crawly things you smash underfoot when they come darting out of a dark, dank corner]
A Curmudgeon’s Halloween
Ted’s a rooster illusion.
Ted flies on the 9/11 anniversary
Oh, TSA. So predictable in your unpredictability.
A list of things
Lists are very important to my organizational schemes.
Hey, I’ve Got an Idea: Summer Construction Edition
Brilliant ideas for pushing Ted’s road rage buttons.
How to RSVP, you loutish clod.
Simple and self-evident, right? Now stop fucking up my parties.
Savoring every bite one open-mouthed chomp at a time.
Your impersonation of a goat noshing on trash dump fruit is spot on. Now quit it.
Bourbon Hipsters. Goddammit.
Ted gazes into the abyss, which gazes back into him. [Shit—Nietzsche hipster…]
