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Don't bother.
—T. Crumski

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Top of the Heap of Hooey ▾
Or:
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Top of the Heap

Whoa! Hey, this might be a good look for me.

Contributed 22nd Feb 2026 by Slappy McGee

“Whoa! Hey, this might be a good look for me.”

Here Lies Betelgeuse

Contributed 22nd Feb 2026 by Slappy McGee

“Nice fuckin’ model!”

Attention K-Mart Shoppers!

Contributed 22nd Feb 2026 by Slappy McGee

“Attention K-Mart Shoppers!”

You think I’m qualified?

Contributed 22nd Feb 2026 by Slappy McGee

“I’ve seen the EXORCIST ABOUT A HUNDRED AND SIXTY-SEVEN TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT… NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU’RE TALKING TO A DEAD GUY… NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK? You think I’m qualified?”

Go ahead, make my millennium.

Contributed 22nd Feb 2026 by Slappy McGee

“Go ahead, make my millennium.”

ODERUS LIVES!

Contributed 4th Nov 2025 by Slappy McGee

Slappy is a bohab. Not “The Ultimate Bohab”, but yeah, pretty bohabby.

The Jersey Devil

Contributed 17th Oct 2025 by Slappy McGee

Fear, for the 13th Child takes flight in the Pine Barrens!

Little Dragon Imp

Contributed 16th Aug 2025 by Slappy McGee

Feeling Lucky?

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2025

Contributed 30th Jun 2025 by Slappy McGee

Week 3 Winner!

Ganesha: He who brings clarity in chaos, strength in stillness.

Contributed 11th May 2025 by Slappy McGee

Welcoming wisdom, prosperity, and new beginnings.

Maxillius the Harvester of the Congregation of Necronominus

Contributed 17th Feb 2025 by Slappy McGee

The Persistence of Time

“It’s not the years, honey, it’s the mileage.”

Contributed 1st Jan 2025 by Slappy McGee

“I don’t know, I’m making this up as I go.”

Lower in the Heap...

  • CARVED: A Demon Xmas
  • Scrooge & Marley
  • Claus & Claws
  • The Ghost of Xmas Past
  • Know what I mean, Vern?
  • It’s Showtime
  • A Hand in the Darkness
  • Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2024
  • May the 4th: Jar Jar’s Hero Fantasy
  • Nossy Gonna Nos

Curated Bescumberment

Whoa! Hey, this might be a good look for me.

Contributed 22nd Feb 2026 by Slappy McGee

“Whoa! Hey, this might be a good look for me.”

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2025

Contributed 30th Jun 2025 by Slappy McGee

Week 3 Winner!

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2024

Contributed 30th Jun 2024 by Slappy McGee

Why do we manage to overcomplicate absolutely everything?

002: Jump Snowman’s Non-Dual Awakening

Contributed 18th Feb 2024 by Slappy McGee

A Pointless Paroxysm #002

Sun Wukong, Awakened to Emptiness

Contributed 15th Aug 2023 by Slappy McGee

Yeah, flirting with Buddhism lately since utter Nihilism has reached a plateau…

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza Tips & BTS

Contributed 15th Jul 2023 by Slappy McGee

The tutorial we were actually asked for!

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2023

Contributed 30th Jun 2023 by Slappy McGee

June saw a burst of content from the CIAJ crew (well, work almost entirely by me, Slappy). We (ah hem, I) participated in Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza, and—to our utter amazement—won Week 3, as chosen by guest […]

Meditations on Curmudgeonry

Contributed 6th May 2023 by Slappy McGee

That’s, like, the perspectival qualitative character of your subjective experience, man.

001: The Instantiation of Gans Boy v2A.00X48751C

Contributed 16th Apr 2023 by Slappy McGee

A Pointless Paroxysm #001

CIAJ on Substack. (Yeah, they’re trying this now.)

Contributed 24th Feb 2022 by Master Redactor

The following message is from the Master Redactor.

Toony Ace Ventura: Nonsense, Poopy-Pants!

Contributed 27th Jan 2022 by Slappy McGee

“Kinda hot in these rhinos…”

Skelegod

Contributed 16th Dec 2021 by Slappy McGee

“Look at my face, child! It has furnished for me a lonely life in which none would have me as a man. So then let me be a god.” (Background image used with permission: “Snake Mountain” by Tony Washington)

THE WHOLE DAMN HEAP

This is the entire sloppy enchilada, ladies and germs … START SHOVELING

Also: The Heap at a Glance

This Heap Is an Amassment of Piles:

… and Bits & Bobs

*FART* Beetlejuice Bif Bang Pow! BioShock booze Clive Barker Coal Dog Cthulhu Dactor's Shitty Robot Pals DAMTOYS Death Gas Station egesta Evil Dead existential dread Figura Obscura Four Horsemen Studios Fun with words G.I. Joe goddamn vampires GoT Hasbro Hellraiser holidays horror toys I hate work Kenner Lovecraft Mattel Mezco MoTU NECA Nosferatu Pinhead politics RAGEgiving Slappy's Menagerie Star Wars Stickybones Super7 Ted's Sarcastic Ideas Ted's Simple Etiquette Rules The Big Lebowski The Loyal Subjects TMNT weather

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