Curmudgeon in a Jar

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Don't bother.
—T. Crumski

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Top of the Heap

Ganesha: He who brings clarity in chaos, strength in stillness.

Contributed 11th May 2025 by Slappy McGee

Welcoming wisdom, prosperity, and new beginnings.

Maxillius the Harvester of the Congregation of Necronominus

Contributed 17th Feb 2025 by Slappy McGee

The Persistence of Time

“It’s not the years, honey, it’s the mileage.”

Contributed 1st Jan 2025 by Slappy McGee

“I don’t know, I’m making this up as I go.”

CARVED: A Demon Xmas

Contributed 25th Dec 2024 by Slappy McGee

“How could things get any worse? Take a look around here. We’re at the threshold of hell.”

Scrooge & Marley

Contributed 24th Dec 2024 by Slappy McGee

Life is short. Don’t study accounting.

Claus & Claws

Contributed 24th Dec 2024 by Slappy McGee

Krampus brought the claws, but the Ghost of Christmas Past brought the TRAUMA.

The Ghost of Xmas Past

Contributed 22nd Dec 2024 by Slappy McGee

A yuletide smokeshow.

Know what I mean, Vern?

Contributed 3rd Nov 2024 by Slappy McGee

You don’t still have your original 1989 Kenner Talking Ernest P. Worrell?!

It’s Showtime

Contributed 31st Oct 2024 by Slappy McGee

You don’t still have your original 1989 Kenner Talking Beetlejuice?!

A Hand in the Darkness

Contributed 7th Oct 2024 by Slappy McGee

In which Frankenstein’s creature is delivered from the shadows into an unsuspecting world by Theodore Sodcutter.

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2024

Contributed 30th Jun 2024 by Slappy McGee

Why do we manage to overcomplicate absolutely everything?

May the 4th: Jar Jar’s Hero Fantasy

Contributed 4th May 2024 by Slappy McGee

“Meesa thinkin’ this unlikely.”

Lower in the Heap...

  • Nossy Gonna Nos
  • Crystar Redux
  • The Maitlands
  • 002: Jump Snowman’s Non-Dual Awakening
  • Curmudgeons Day 2024
  • [Beetlejuice]*3
  • Bartholomew Vex
  • Happy Holidays from CIAJ, the Jolliest Bunch of A*holes
  • The Ghost of Jacob Marley
  • Welcome to Gangreene Estates

Curated Bescumberment

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2024

Contributed 30th Jun 2024 by Slappy McGee

Why do we manage to overcomplicate absolutely everything?

002: Jump Snowman’s Non-Dual Awakening

Contributed 18th Feb 2024 by Slappy McGee

A Pointless Paroxysm #002

Sun Wukong, Awakened to Emptiness

Contributed 15th Aug 2023 by Slappy McGee

Yeah, flirting with Buddhism lately since utter Nihilism has reached a plateau…

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza Tips & BTS

Contributed 15th Jul 2023 by Slappy McGee

The tutorial we were actually asked for!

Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza 2023

Contributed 30th Jun 2023 by Slappy McGee

June saw a burst of content from the CIAJ crew (well, work almost entirely by me, Slappy). We (ah hem, I) participated in Stickybones Pose-A-Palooza, and—to our utter amazement—won Week 3, as chosen by guest […]

Meditations on Curmudgeonry

Contributed 6th May 2023 by Slappy McGee

That’s, like, the perspectival qualitative character of your subjective experience, man.

001: The Instantiation of Gans Boy v2A.00X48751C

Contributed 16th Apr 2023 by Slappy McGee

A Pointless Paroxysm #001

CIAJ on Substack. (Yeah, they’re trying this now.)

Contributed 24th Feb 2022 by Master Redactor

The following message is from the Master Redactor.

Toony Ace Ventura: Nonsense, Poopy-Pants!

Contributed 27th Jan 2022 by Slappy McGee

“Kinda hot in these rhinos…”

Skelegod

Contributed 16th Dec 2021 by Slappy McGee

“Look at my face, child! It has furnished for me a lonely life in which none would have me as a man. So then let me be a god.” (Background image used with permission: “Snake Mountain” by Tony Washington)

Mutagen Man

Contributed 20th May 2021 by Slappy McGee

“the slime of all my yesterdays rots in the hollow of my skull”—Syliva Plath

Shredder, you gotta listen to reason! You’re gonna kill us all!

Contributed 13th May 2021 by Slappy McGee

“THEN SO BE IT!”

THE WHOLE DAMN HEAP

This is the entire sloppy enchilada, ladies and germs … START SHOVELING

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… and Bits & Bobs

*FART* Beetlejuice Bif Bang Pow! BioShock booze Clive Barker Coal Dog Cthulhu Dactor's Shitty Robot Pals DAMTOYS egesta Evil Dead existential dread Four Horsemen Studios Fun with words G.I. Joe goddamn vampires GoT Hasbro Hellraiser holidays horror toys I hate work Kenner LOTR Lovecraft Mattel meditation Mezco MoTU NECA Nosferatu Pinhead politics RAGEgiving Slappy's Menagerie Star Wars Stickybones Super7 Ted's Sarcastic Ideas Ted's Simple Etiquette Rules The Big Lebowski The Loyal Subjects TMNT weather

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